Week 40 or 42 into my pregnancy

Monday we had a short antenatal class with our doula, I hope William learned a few things. I think he’s still hooked on the idea of me going to his mum’s for a week after Tazlin’s birth – I still say; if she wants to help then she can come to my place, I wish we had money to hire someone for a week, but we’re not financially stable now for such things.

I started drinking Raspberry Leaf tea, I hope it really helps as well as everybody says. It’s supposed to help soften the cervix, shorten the 2^nd stage of labour, help with the milk let down and make your uterus contract back to its normal size faster. I had my first cup Monday evening and at about 1h45am Tuesday morning I had a rather strong contraction on the left of my abdomen and it shot down my leg, it was more of a numbing pain than anything else - but it faded away and I am still waiting for more.

I get people telling me that I look relaxed a lot. I haven’t noticed but do woman tend to get so badly stressed out at this time of pregnancy that you can tell they are stressed by the look on their faces? I just don’t have any reason to stress I suppose! I did ask God for peace in my spirit, and even with the contraction of last night I’m still at peace. The only thought that ran through my mind was; “If this is how it hurts now, how much more will it hurt in true labour?” I think I had a split second of panic there for a moment, but I’m fine now!

You always hear about these poor women experiencing bladder incontinence, it must be really embarrassing! And it is, I experienced it first hand and the worst part was that I actually thought I was leaking amniotic fluid! I mean you’d think you’ll feel it coming on if it is urine – but I felt nothing, it would just “pour out”, hence, me thinking it was amniotic fluid! I experienced this on Wednesday and Thursday only though – “Thank Goodness!”

Thursday evening, Elmarie came over to paint as with every other week. I started getting those really strong ‘period-like’ pains again, and decided to time them with my Braxton hicks – who knows, maybe it could be the real thing! They varied from 20-25minutes apart and were consistent, that’s when I knew; this is it – I’m in early labour. My poor friend was so excited, hoping that baby would come that night! But the pains didn’t really get much worse.

I had those pains all throughout the night but it didn’t keep me from sleeping “I simply love it too much!” I did contact my Doula Friday morning and told her I think I might be going into labour, she thought perhaps I didn’t know what I was talking about and simply told me I should contact her again when the pains get too much for me to handle. At about 1pm I decided to start timing the contractions as they were getting stronger and nothing I did gave me any relief of them. The contractions were now between 4-6minutes apart, I asked my Doula when should I go to the maternity clinic and again she said when the pains gets too much for me to handle. I decided that I’m not going to stay home any longer and phoned my mother-inlaw to take me to the clinic, I also told the Doula that I’m going and of course my hubby – he still asked me if I think I’m going into labour or if I really am in labour, little did he know that labour started the night before already!

When we got to the clinic at 3pm I was 5cm dilated already! My Doula was impressed and apologized for thinking I didn’t know what I was talking about. I could still move around and did just that, we went for a walk and I bounced on the birthing ball to help baby move down into the birthing canal. William was an absolute star! It was like having my own cheer leader/ support team by my side.

Most of the pain was in my back and the contractions were on top of each other, by 6pm they moved me into the labour ward and had me bouncing on the birthing ball to get baby into the birthing canal. By now, I wanted to push with each and every contraction I got, but I had to keep myself from doing so as neither me nor baby were ready for birth. By 6h30pm they finally gave me the go-ahead to let me push, it was difficult! The sister wasn’t very clear on what she wanted me to do, she expected me to give one big push without stealing any breaths in between, how on earth can one push like that for how long ever!?

It was finally time for her to go off duty and another sister came in to help us. She was absolutely brilliant! When pushing she told me to take a quick breath and carry on pushing. William was there by my side all the while, cheering me on and telling me how well I’m doing; all this from the man who was scared to go into the labour ward just a few months ago!

At exactly 7pm our beautiful daughter was born, at a healthy 3.820kg, measuring 54cm. After all I had just gone through, everything else which happened were in the background, from the third stage of labour to being stitched up; I only had eyes for my little princess. Shame they had to put her into the incubator as it was freezing cold in the labour room since I had them put the air conditioner on during birth, I was burning out and everyone else were freezing cold. I can’t think that any women giving birth would worry about their feet being cold, if they are anything like me – they’d feel like they’re giving birth in the core of the earth!

For some there’s only the pain of birth, for others like me there’s the after pain of birth as well. I can barely walk, it feels like my pelvis is being pulled apart with every step I give, in my life have I never moved this slowly and it frustrates the hell out of me! It looks like I got trauma to my pelvis, just my luck! At least I’ve got a miracle to show for all my pain and suffering.

39 or 41 Weeks into my Pregnancy

I had these really strong period-like pains Sunday evening and as I went to the loo during the night, I realised that I definitely lost my mucus plug. It’s not at all like that clever white sister explained it to me! It’s not like a type of gel consistency as she said – this looked like gob with blood in it “a lot of gob”!

I’m so excited now! This means that labour can start any day now! I read that normally within three days of the bloody show labour can start, but then again – I also read of woman who lost theirs a week or so before labour. I hope it’s not so with me!

I’m starting to wonder if I haven’t wasted my money by hiring a doula… I mean I seek advice from her and it’s like she can’t answer me so she just rolls over to another topic. I told her about the bloody show and when she thinks I would go into labour, instead of telling me whatever; she simply asked me how far my pains were apart! My word I got so frustrated! It’s like she has no advice for me, and that she’s only there for the labour! I really hope that she’d prove me wrong through all of this; I hope she’s the money’s worth I’m paying.

It almost feels like the Braxton Hicks contractions have lessened since Monday. I’ve had no more pains or discomfort like that of Sunday evening. I’m so exhausted; it feels like my body doesn’t want to go on any more. I get all these ideas of things I want to do; but between the heat and my unwilling body I’m fighting a losing battle.

Every day I wake up; I hope and pray that today will be the day! But nothing has happened thus far.

Looks like Sunday is the day for things to happen! I’ve had strange aches and pains in and around my abdomen again today with almost constant Braxton Hicks Contractions. Maybe something will happen later tonight or early next week. Well, I really hope that little one makes her appearance soon; because I for one cannot wait any more!

41 Weeks into my Pregnancy

We have entered this week hoping and praying every day that this would be the day in which Tazlin would come. This week is really turning out to be the worst one thus far. Not just is this pregnancy stretching me to my wits but I’m worried out of my mind about Tigger. We heard a cat meow both Monday and Tuesday morning, and it sounded exactly like Tigger on Tuesday – it sounded so close yet I couldn’t find him! I will not stop praying for his safe return home. William recons that this is a sign from God; since Tigger is an Attention Addict, he thinks Tigger would get jealous when baby gets here and run away anyhow.

I’m getting increasingly uncomfortable with “strange” aches and pains all over which is all supposed to signal impending labour – though it feels like I’m just going to carry on forever like this! I’ve made Tazlin’s comforter and all her clothes are washed, I’ve got just about nothing more to prepare for her.

I went for my check-up on Friday, and now they don’t know how far I really am! They recon between 38 and 40 weeks, now I just have to go by that and hope my baby will be fine!

Tazlin’s fully engaged so now we’re just waiting for her to come out! I hope it will still be this week or early next week. I’m so tired of walking around like this!

The sister at the clinic said that if baby has not arrived by the 30^th of March that I should go in to Dora Ngenza Hospital on that day so they can induce my labour. I hope it doesn’t come to that… I’m just scared that they would want to give me a caesarean and that is the last thing I want! You take so much longer to heal from that than with normal birth!

40 Weeks into my Pregnancy

Mum came to visit this week, I’m hoping that this little rascal would come whilst mum’s still here.

I’m worried though, what if she doesn’t come on her due date – the people at the clinic still recons that I’m three weeks earlier in the pregnancy. Doesn’t it get more dangerous for the baby the further you go over your time? I just pray that she’ll come out in time.

Finally I could go for a walk, with mum here I can be assured if something happens on the walk, there will be someone by my side if something has to happen. I’ve been both more active and more tired this week, I took advantage of mum being here to go for walks, but I practically had to have a nap every day for about an hour and a half, then I’d still feel like I haven’t slept for days.

Tigger and Mischiff have been acting quite differently towards me this week, it’s like they are iron and my stomach is a huge magnet, they simply can’t get enough of me!

My heart’s broken! Early Wednesday morning I got up to go sleep in the lounge since I got too hot in the room – Tigger had just come in from outside and was sleeping at our feet along with Mischiff. I rubbed him and then went off to the lounge. When I woke up later to get Will ready for work, Tigger wasn’t there – so I figured he’d come when I give nice-foodies to Mischiff; I called to him but nothing. I should’ve closed that window – he would’ve perhaps still been here!

We went walking around the block calling to Tigger, hoping he’d come back home. I figured he’d be home by sunset but yet again – nothing. So I decided we have to go round the neighbourhood on Thursday. I call to him every morning and evening, so that if he’s nearby he’d hear me, I’m totally devastated; he’s never gone away whilst I was still around, he once disappeared for a day and a half when I was visiting my family in another province – but this is just ridiculous. I pray God will protect him and show him the way back.

We walked a lot again on Friday; I started getting strong period-like pains. Nothing like I’ve had thus far; so our hopes really went up – thinking that perhaps this could be the very early stages of labour. Could it be that me worrying about Tigger is keeping labour away? I’ve read that stress could sometimes keep labour from progressing since you’re all tense, I try doing my relaxation breathing but how can I put away the concern I have for my missing feline baby.

Mischiff has been taking full advantage of Tigger not being here, she has conquered my belly and taken it over as her territory. It is interesting to see how she has gone from avoiding me  to being all over me – who knows, maybe that’s another sign of impending labour, but when exactly – I don’t know.

The time has finally arrived for mum to go home, and disappointingly enough – Tazlin has still not been born!

39 Weeks into my Pregnancy

I finally made the canvasses for my little butterfly’s room, so I’ve decided to paint the butterfly metamorphosis on them, starting with the caterpillar this week. I hope it will all come out ok.

Shame Elmarie was quite nervous when I got there this week for our painting date. She was just so scared that I might go into labour. But that didn’t happen – we painted for four hours again, it’s fun! I love it – you totally get lost in what you’re doing, it’s like an escape from reality.

It feels like I’m on a train who’s departure keeps getting put off, I am really tired of being pregnant now – the only joy I still find in it is when my precious moves within me, that’s it! I am at a point where I have but a few items in my closet which still fits and it ain’t enough to last a week, I am so frustrated for what will the point be in buying new clothes now if I know I’ll be delivering my honeycomb in the next few days. I suppose all I can do is to hold on and hope for the best.

Tigger is taking up all the attention, I really try and give both my cats equal attention but it’s difficult when one is all over you and the other on its own mission, I’m actually scared that Mischiff will look for another home if it goes on like this. I have to find a way to give her equal attention to what Tigger is demanding! I love them both so much and can’t imagine losing either one of them; they have been my babies for four years after all.

I’m starting to wonder if I’m not only 36 weeks pregnant after all, I did some research the other day to see if you can in fact feel foetal movement from 11 weeks. With the hope of finding out that it is absolutely impossible I came across a website where almost 30 first time mums claimed to have felt their baby move at 11 weeks and their pregnancies progressed normally. I simply can’t see myself walking around like this for another four weeks!

38 Weeks into my Pregnancy

I’ve been waiting expectantly for baby to come, but she seems rather comfortable where she’s at now. I’m truly hoping and praying that my butterfly would come this week – since my mum will be visiting from the 26^th to the 6^th of March. I’m getting much more Braxton hicks and I’m sure she’s getting ready to come – other than the Braxton hicks I’m just experiencing heavy discomfort and fatigue, the slight pains of last week is gone – the sister said those could’ve been false labour pains – which I certainly knew because it was simply a discomfort to me and didn’t really hurt.

I tried painting something for Tazlin’s room last week, but I think it’s too dark – it didn’t come out quite as I had hoped. And to top it all off, I spilled a whole lot of turpentine on the lounge carpet – so it reeked for quite a while as if I was painting.

I woke up with a fever blister under my tongue on my gums this morning; I don’t know what that is all about. But I suppose it’s all part of the pregnancy.

We were looking at some pictures last night and I’m really starting to think that I had a quite alright build before I fell pregnant – I just can’t wait to get my pre-pregnancy body back and to be able to fit into my clothes again. But more so I can’t wait until baby’s born, so I can sleep on my back and tummy again and not have this problem of swollen feet and hands that leads to numb fingers. I know I won’t have a proper nights rest in the next few months but at least the sleep I’ll be getting will be worry free except for the worry of my baby waking up.

Oh, it all seems like a dream! I hope Tazlin comes soon!

And just as I thought to be one of the lucky ones not to get kicked in the ribs, it happened; at the most difficult of times, 3:30am as if my sleep wasn’t interrupted enough she had her foot lodged in my side and didn’t matter how I laid it just kept on hurting like hell.

Today was a very lazy day, apart from me trying to sort my books out for studying for my exams; I had a very quiet and peaceful day – topped off with a late afternoon nap. Maybe I can do what I wished to do then tomorrow; make canvasses for Tazlin’s room.

37 Weeks into my Pregnancy

It felt strange waking up Monday morning and not having to get ready for work. It was Valentine’s Day & William’s Birthday; we were invited to a braai at his step-grandmother’s for his birthday, they had some friends of her husband’s there and they were playing “boeremusiek” Honestly, I did not enjoy the music at all – but William rather enjoyed playing with the old ballies (^^,)

I started washing baby’s clothes, and sorting things out. It’s just that from 3 months up that needs washing now, it feels like I have piles of clothing for baby – but in honest truth I think it’s not that much. I’m starting to wonder if I am in actual fact ever going to have a baby shower for my friends here – I think I should just have organised it myself. I had the show today and that means that labour could start any minute, day or week from now. Maybe we’ll end up having a welcome party for baby instead!

William promised the guys at work that I’d be sending mini doughnuts to work, but honestly – I don’t feel like bothering with that still in this heat. I’m going to another lady from church’s baby shower Tuesday evening and I’ll be making mini doughnuts to take with – I suppose I can make an extra batch for William to take to work then on Tuesday, I could even make the dough and let him make it! I think that sounds like a better idea.

We’ve decided that I should go for my follow up visit Friday morning since I’ve had the show – that’s if baby hasn’t come by then.

So we have been scheduled to sing at Saturday’s Valentine’s dinner, I am working on my dress for then – but if baby comes before then, we’ll only go for the song – shame we can’t totally drop them. At least go do the song and come home, I’m sure William’s mum won’t mind looking after Tazlin for an hour or so; she must just leave her brat dog at home!

I never made the mini doughnuts, not for the baby shower nor for the guys at his work. Man I just don’t feel like it! This hot weather’s driving me insane! I mean if it was a bit cooler I might get more done, but I’m swollen up like a balloon and everything I try ‘n accomplish is more than a mission and a half. I haven’t had any other signs of labour apart from the show on Monday, though I am getting dull period-like pains with my Braxton Hicks and lower backache now and then – but it’s not consistent enough to say “I am officially in labour”. I wish it would just happen already, I’m sure I’d get more done being my old self! It feels like baby could come though, this week – William’s saying she’ll come next week Tuesday, though I don’t know what is so significant about that particular date – maybe he just sensed it in the spirit. Though he did say that he wants baby to come on the 28^th when my mum’s here, I think he’s trying to get out of being in the labour ward with me.

That man is so stressed out, honestly – you’d swear he’s going to go through all the pains of labour.

Tonight, Wednesday 16 Feb, we’re having the rehearsal for Saturday’s Valentines Dinner – William says though if baby comes before Saturday there’s no way we’re going anywhere! So much for not wanting to let the people down.

I’m going for my follow up visit tomorrow, coz my Doula contacted me to tell me that their having a pregnancy education week at the clinic tomorrow – so I figured I’ll go for my follow up; then I wouldn’t have to go into town again on Friday.

I saw the white sister again! Somehow I’m starting to dislike her, she never says anything I want to hear, I thought I had my show on Monday but it turns out that it was just part of the mucous plug that came out and not all of it, but she still figures that I’m only 35 weeks pregnant!

Saturday evening was a huge success, and lucky for them – baby didn’t come before then. I experienced though what I thought was nesting on Saturday; but I’m not too sure if that was it. I had this energy to do a whole lot of things I’ve been putting off and it was operation deep clean. I hope this means baby will come soon.